Pregnancy Dream

It's been quite a long time since I've had a pregnancy dream. It always baffles me when I dream of being pregnant, because anyone who knows me is aware that I am not a fan of children (especially small children and infants), and that I desperately want to sterilize myself so that I never have to worry about that. I'm not allowed to do such a thing, though, because no doctor would perform this operation on me (at least none that I've found!) due to my age and the lack of medical necessity. Basically, I'm young so they think I'm going to be likely to change my mind one day and want kids (which would be my problem and not theirs, so I don't see why it's their business. If that happens there's always adoption), and without a medical issue involving my reproductive internal organs they are unlikely to make an exception.

Anyway, enough of that since it's not got anything to do with my dream!

It wasn't really a very involved dream at all. It dark outside and I was standing in the front yard, off to the side of the driveway and toward the evergreen that is in the front yard, staring at the house. The lights were on and I was feeling anxious and worried about going inside. I had a friend next to me, a man (who is a friend even if I'm not dreaming, he does exist!), who was there to provide moral support. I was dreading having to tell my parents that I'm pregnant (in the dream only, I am NOT pregnant IRL). So, I was hesitating outside. From the dream, I got the impression that they were not expecting me to even be there. So, this would be a complete surprise visit.

My friend realized my anxiety and worry, so he reached over and lightly rubbed my belly. I was showing pretty well, but not too much. I think I was probably around the second trimester in month 5, according to the chart above.

The rubbing felt good, it made me feel less worried and anxious. He was going to stop, so I reached up and put my hand on his and made him continue. He didn't complain and just continued, I guess silently realizing that it was helping me to gain my courage.

In the dream, I got the distinct impression that the father of that baby was NOT in the picture, and that the man standing next to me was not a boyfriend, was not a husband, was not a friend with benefits, and was not interested in becoming any of those things. I did, however, get the impression that I wished he was the father of the baby. I did not get an impression of whether that was because I was afraid of raising a baby alone, and I did not get an impression of whether it was because I personally had feelings for this man.

In real life, however, I do NOT have feelings for that man. And I do not want children. So, I have no idea where this dream came from. Most likely this dream had nothing to do with what it seemed to. It was probably my subconscious attempting to tell me something using symbolism. I might consult a few dream dictionaries and whatnot to see what my subconscious may be attempting to tell me. Or I might just ignore it.

Hell, maybe it just means I'd like to have more fullfilment in my life in general (not through children, but just in general), and maybe I'm also a tad lonely and I just don't realize either of these things so my subconscious thought it was important to help me realize it. Who knows? But, hey, it's a theory. :p


But, yes, that was the entire dream. We never went into my parents' house, we never spoke to my parents. We never even spoke to each other. The entire dream was just us standing outside (in the summer, I think, since it wasn't cold and there was green grass and leaves on trees), being silent and staring at the house. And then I woke up.